The tarot card above is from the Osho Zen Tarot deck. If you're into that sort of thing, this card reminds us if we try too hard to control our lives and the situations surrounding us, we can miss out on experiences and personal growth. In addition, we most certainly can't control the lives and minds of others and will only hurt ourselves (and others) if we try. Plus, control can complicate things and increases stress, whereas acceptance can reduce a lot of anxiety.
I spoke with a very wise woman the other day about the issue of control. I've advised plenty of friends throughout the years not to try so hard to force things and mold the world to fit their belief systems. We can make choices to help drive our lives in certain ways. But ultimately nothing is certain. Circumstances above and beyond our control often change the outcome to something we had not idea would come our way. Sometimes, it's good. Sometimes, not so good. But you can always learn from the change brought on by our ultimate lack of control.
That said, I realized I've recently tried my hand at controlling something -- or someone -- out of my hands. My partner in life, love and whatever comes our way is a dreamer. I'm more cautious and prefer to avoid risks whenever possible. When he shares his dreams and whims with me, I project my own way of thinking and assume what he says will become reality. Sometimes it does, but just as often he is simply sharing his dreams and thinking aloud. Regardless, all I can do is share my concerns and needs and try my best to listen, really listen, to his concerns and needs. And someday one of those grandiose dreams might just significantly benefit both of us. Then again, someday those dreams could hurt us. Or maybe they'll help him, but not me. I simply have to stay in the moment, appreciate each day we have together and accept whatever this short life has to offer.
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